An Icy Blue Sky
by Bohemian Diamonds
Summary: *CHAPTER FIVE IS UP* Toulouse has found love in a young spunky dancer named Lolita. Will Lolita be able to love him back?
1. Meet Lolita and Toulouse

An Icy Blue Sky.  
Disclaimer: I still own nothing.  
  
Toulouse's P.O.V.  
  
I took a deep breath as I gazed up at the icy blue sky. The sky was shot pink and lavender as well as blue. Christian and Satine were back inside working on the play. I was sitting outside on the railing that ran around the windows of my top apartment.  
I sighed and gazed down into the small pavilion in front of the Moulin Rouge. Then I saw her.  
Lolita. That was her name, and she was Nini's niece. She was so young but she was already starting her singing career here in Montmartre. She stayed with her aunt Nini and sang and can-canned most nights at the Moulin Rouge.  
I gazed down at the sketchbook in my lap and saw that I had been sketching Lolita's face without even knowing it. She was so beautiful for such a young girl. She wasn't a courtesan but she was favored by many men at the Moulin Rouge, including the Duke. Most nights when I was at the Moulin Rouge skecthing the can-can dancers for my next lithograph I would see the Duke watching her. He watched her like a dog would watch a bone or a piece of meat. It was disgusting. It made me sick to my stomach. When I looked at her I saw a living angel. A living angel and a shooting star all at once.  
As Christian would say, how wonderful life is, now you're in the world. I had to agree; how wonderful life was, now that Lolita was in the world.  
  
Lolita's P.O.V.  
  
I was walking out of the Moulin Rouge that particular evening.  
"Good night Baby Doll, I'll see you tomorrow,"  
"Bye Lolita," she called after me.   
I headed out the door and looked up at the beautiful evening sky.  
//Is he looking at it now?// I wondered. Then I looked up and saw him sitting on his railing. He had a sketchbook in his lap and he was looking straight down at me. I waved up at him and called out, "Hello Toulouse!"  
He looked down at me and I could tell he was smiling.  
It's true. I was in love with Toulouse-Lautrec.  
Silly, isn't it? Here I am, not even a courtesan and I was breaking the only rule laid out for us at the Moulin Rouge. Never fall in love. If my Aunt Nini knew, she'd probably throw me out onto the streets and leave me there to die. She had no tolerance for love and she had always warned me against it.  
"Always give your body, but never your heart Lola. Never forget that."  
But how could I remember that the very first time I'd seen Toulouse? He'd been sitting there, his Absinthe glass on the table, drawing with his charcoal. The only time he'd looked up during the whole performance had been to ask me to pose for him. At first I had been suprised by how small he was but then I'd said yes.  
As he had drawn me, I'd seen a light in his eyes. A light which outshone his small size and severe lisp. A light that had been an instant attraction to me.  
After that I'd started to make up excuses just to see him. I couldn't believe I'd fallen in love so easily with him but I had.  
My only problem was that I couldn't let my Aunt Nini find out. But what could I do? I didn't want to disobey my Aunt Nini, but at the same time I didn't want to disobey my own heart.  
What ever was I to do? 


	2. The Painting Session

Lolita's P.O.V.  
  
That day, I was off to Toulouse's studio to pose for one of this paintings. I was wearing my favorite black velvet dress with my rosebud hem and matching hat.  
When I got there I knocked on the door. A voice called out, "It's owpen!"  
I stepped inside to find Toulouse sitting inside priming his canvas and drinking a glass of wine.  
"Ah Lolita! You look fwabulous!" Toulouse said cheerily.  
I smiled shyly and said, "Um, thank you Toulouse,"  
Noticing that we were alone I said, "Where is everyone?"  
"Oh, thwey went to the mwarket," Toulouse answered brightly.  
Feeling both nervous and happy, I stepped over to a chair and sat down nervously. Toulouse poured me a glass of wine and said,"So you can relax La Melinte,"  
I blushed and sipped my wine slowly, expecting it to be the bitter Absinthe I was so used to. But it wasn't. It was actually good quality wine. I was rather impressed.  
As he painted me, he poured me more wine and smiled at me more and more.  
A half hour later, I was feeling a bit woozy from all the wine and I could tell Toulouse was feeling the same. He was smiling at me in a very drunken way now.   
All of a sudden he put his brush and canvas aside and put his hand on mine and stared deeply into my eyes.  
"Lolita, I-I feel that I can tell you anything you know," he slurred out.  
I was sober enough to understand what he was saying, but I was too drunk to answer him properly.  
"What I'm trying to say, La Melinite, is that I-I......  
"NO!" I cried as I sprang out of my chair and pulled my hand out from under Toulouse's  
I'm not sure how, but somehow I managed to finish my wine, find my hat, and rush out the door all in one motion.  
I managed to get back to the Moulin Rouge with tears dripping down my cheeks.  
It was dark when I got back. Wordlessly, I ran back to my dressing room and shut my door and leaned against it.  
"I-I love him. I love him, and yet I can't love him. Oh Toulouse, why did you have to make everything so terribly complicated?"  
A soft voice then said, "I see. So the rumors about you and the petit drunk were true!"  
I turned around to see my Aunt Nini walk out of the shadows with murder in her eyes.  
A/N: Thanks SOOO much to all of my reviewers and especially my wicked awesome beta! I'm hard at work on the next chappie and it'll be up soon!  
~Bohemian Diamonds 


	3. Discovery

Aunt Nini walked right up to me and looked at me in a way that reminded me of a cobra about to strike.  
"Aunt Nini I-  
With a hand quicker than lightining she reached out and grabbed a handful of my hair. Then she shoved me onto my knees and hissed out, "What did I tell you about falling in love you ungrateful little brat?"  
Reeling against the pain in my scalp I said, "Never--never fall in love."  
"That's right. Now do you remember what I said would happen to you if you broke the rule?"  
"You said I'd get thrown out onto the streets."   
"And that's exactly what'll happen if I ever hear you say something like that ever again!" she exploded, pushing me so hard that I lost my balance and banged my head hard against the wall. I looked up at her with tears forming in my eyes. She then grabbed my hair again, pulled me close and said, "End it. End it with the dwarf and I won't have you thrown out onto the streets."  
She let go of my hair and walked out. I lay there for a while and cried.  
The next morning I awoke and went into the bathroom to wash up. As I looked into the mirror I thought about what I was going to tell Toulouse. I didn't want to do this to him since I loved him so much. But if I didn't I would wind up begging for money in some gutter.  
As much as I wanted it, I had to face facts: I just couldn't have love.  
Five minutes later I was walking out of the Moulin Rouge and to Toulouse's studio. When I got there I knocked on the door and waited nervously. When it opened there was Toulouse staring up at me.  
"Hi. May I please come in?" I asked. He nodded and let me in. The studio was empty again, but this time I didn't ask why.   
Toulouse looked at me and said, "Lolita, about last night-  
"Toulouse I......I can't see you again."  
"What? But-but why?"   
I felt the pain grow heavily in my heart as I said, "My aunt Nini found out about last nigt. She's forbidden me to see you again."  
Before Toulouse could say anything I turned and walked out.  
A/N Thanks SO much to all of my wicked sweet reviewers and my terrific beta! You guys inspire me to write another day!  
Chapter four will be up soon!  
~Bohemian Diamonds 


	4. Christian's Visit

Slowly and painfully I walked back to the Moulin Rouge trying like hell not to cry. It wasn't easy. I has just destroyed the one person who I loved most in the whole world. How could I not hate myself?  
  
My Aunt Nini was waiting in my dressing room when I got back.  
  
"Well?" she demanded?  
  
"I told him."  
  
"Good. Now get dressed. We've got a show in two hours and I don't need you moping around here like some drunk bohemian."  
  
She turned and left then. I felt so much like slapping my aunt then. How dare she try to control my life when she spent her's either drunk or letting some man beat her senseless?  
  
I hated her. I hated her and yet I couldn't disobey her. The last time I had, she'd hit me so hard my ose had bled.  
  
With anger brewing in my heart I found my practice skirts and got dressed.  
  
********************************************************************************************  
  
Toulouse was sitting on the floor of his studio, a half empty bottle of Absinthe next to him. We watched him nervously as he drank and mumbled out drunken phrases about Lolita.  
  
"Stupid girl...beautiful but...why did I let her...foolish I was!"  
  
I hated to see Toulouse like this. I wondered why Lolita would do something like this when she knew how much he loved her.  
  
"Fwoolish bitch!" Toulouse screamed, throwing his Absinthe bottle at the wall.   
  
I turned away. It stung my heart to see one of my friends in this much pain.  
  
It was then I had made up my mind. I found my coat and left to go see Lolita.  
  
********************************************************************************************  
  
I returned to my dressing room to start prepping for tonight's show. The lead weight in my chest had still not lifted but I tried to ignore it.  
  
Just as I had slid into my lavender dressing gown there was a knock at the door.  
  
"Who is it?" I called.  
  
The door opened slightly and Christian poked his head in.  
  
I looked at him and said, "I know why you're here Christian and nothing you say will make me change my mind."  
  
"Why did you do that to him?"  
  
I looked at Christian and said, "I've got my reasons. What do you care anyway?"  
  
"I care because Toulouse is my friend and now he's in his studio completly drunk over you! All I want to know is why!"  
  
I said nothing. If I told him why he would think I was too weak and pathetic to take care of myself, let alone someone like Toulouse.  
  
"Well? Do you even have a reason?"  
  
"She threatened me, all right?!" I exploded, knocking a glass to the floor. "My Aunt Nini threatened to throw me out unless I told him I could never see him again! You know I love him Chrstian, I'm just not allowed to!   
  
He looked at me.  
  
"And I hate it! I hate to think of him drunk and alone thinking I don't love him when I do! I'm sorry, I just can't be with him."  
  
I turned away and began sweeping up the glass with my blush brush.  
  
"Is that really what you believe? Or is it just what you've been taught to believe?" he asked.  
  
At Christian's words I stopped cold. Was that really me saying all those things? Or was it the cold and unfeeling bitch I would slowly turn into if I stayed here?  
  
Christian interpreted my silence as an answer.   
  
"He'll be here tonight."  
  
"Why?"   
  
"I just know it."  
  
With that Christian walked out the door, shutting it firmly behind him. 


	5. You Look So Fine

I was standing in the wings with Travesty and Baby Doll while Satine performed her Sparkling Diamond routine. I was nervously peeking out into the audience to see if Toulouse was really out there like Christian had said.  
  
Just then Satine came hurrying into the wings.  
  
"Is he out there Satine? Is he really?" I asked.  
  
"Yes, yes he is! He's sitting with Christian and the rest of the bohemians. Now just go out there and sing!"  
  
I was so nervous, I wasn't even sure I would be able to remember all the words to my song.  
  
As Satine and Baby Doll rushed me back to my dressing room to get me ready I said, "But Satine, what if I can't remember all my words?"  
  
"Don't worry Lola! We'll all be there to help in case you get stuck on something!" Baby Doll said as she brushed rouge onto my cheeks and lined my eyes with kohl.  
  
" I know, but still-"  
  
"No buts Lolita! Now I know you're nervous but we know you can do it! Now go!" Satine said, pushing me out behind the stage.  
  
Harold came hurrying over to us and said, "Is she ready?"  
  
"Yes, yes she is."   
  
"Well, then get her out there!"  
  
Satine was going to introduce me, so she went out first. Moments later I heard her introduction.  
  
"And now I'd like to introduce a special girl by the name of Lolita, who is making her solo singing debut tonight!"  
  
Quickly I stepped out to a rousing round of applause. I took a deep breath and began to sing my song.  
  
You look so fine  
  
I want to break your heart  
  
and give you mine  
  
You're taking me over  
  
It's so insane  
  
You've got me tethered and chained  
  
I hear your name  
  
and I'm falling over  
  
I'm not like all the other girls  
  
I can't take it like the other girls  
  
I won't share it like the other girls  
  
that you used to know   
  
You look so fine  
  
Knocked down  
  
Cried out  
  
Been down just to find out  
  
I'm through  
  
Bleeding for you  
  
I'm open wide  
  
I want to take you home  
  
We'll waste some time  
  
You're the only one for me  
  
You look so fine  
  
I'm like the desert tonight  
  
Leave her behind  
  
I f you want to show me  
  
I'm not like all the other girls  
  
I won't take it like the other girls  
  
I won't fake it like the other girls  
  
that you used to know  
  
You're taking me over  
  
Over and over  
  
I'm falling over  
  
Over and over  
  
You're taking me over  
  
drown in me one more time  
  
hide inside me tonight  
  
do what you want to do  
  
just pretend happy end  
  
let me know let it show  
  
ending with letting go  
  
ending with letting go  
  
ending with letting go  
  
let's pretend happy end  
  
let's pretend happy end  
  
let's pretend happy end  
  
let's pretend happy end  
  
As I finished my song I saw Toulouse looking at me with tears in his eyes.  
  
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A/N: Sorry I've taken so long with this installment. Life has been so hectic for me lately and this is the first time I've had a chance to really work on anything. So, enjoy! Plus Fanfiction.net wouldn't let me upload.  
  
Song Used: You Look So Fine by Garbage. 


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